Dog Eat dog. Yes, eat the dog.

Dogs.

In America, they are man's best friend. They are fond companions, who will pick up your spirits when you feel down, deter criminals from breaking and entering and lick your face until it turns into an oversized prune.

For the most part, if your name is not Michael Vick, they love you and you love them. They show allegiance and respect to an owner like a son would to a father. They are part of the family. Sometimes even more so than an unfortunate-looking sibling or cross-eyed, binge-drinking uncle.

Golden retrievers, Beagles, Terriers, Miniature Schnowzas, Chow Chows. Heck, even Chinese Shar-Peis! Although, now we're beginning to look more and more like that unfortunate looking sibling.

One dog to stay away from- Lhasa Apsos. They may look cute and harmless, but will destroy your house and tear your family apart. Also, if you have any newborn babies lying around, they will try and eat them.

But generally, dogs are the staple pet in America. They are glamorized on TV, in films- "Lassie," "All Dogs Go To Heaven."

Has there ever been a movie about all humans going to Heaven? Never.

But there has been a movie about the evil nature of humans called "The Cannibal Holocaust."

Say those words again out loud.

Are there any two worse words in any language in the entire world?

It's true. Many times, especially on the silver screen, dogs are shone in a better light than our fellow man and woman.

I remember celebrating when the dog in "Dante's Peak" avoided the flowing lava and jumped safely into Pierce Brosnan's volcano-proof pickup truck.

However, I couldn't help but laugh when the stubborn Grandmother had both of her legs burned off in the acid lake.

Homeward Bound is another movie that gives human-like qualities to dogs.

- Go to the 7 minute mark.

But what about in Korea?

How are dogs treated?

Well, first off, they are eaten in many restaurants throughout the country. Probably more so in North Korea, where it's either dog meat or sand.

There is actually a dinner spot about 3 minutes from my house where you can order dog. It's right next door to the sweet egg bread stand. I still do not know what they put inside their bread.

Dog meat is supposedly good for your stomach and can also help cancer patients. I don't know how. Maybe the fact that you can eat Lassie for dinner makes conquering cancer seem like nothing.

Will I eat dog? I think so. Not because I have cancer or stomach problems, but because I feel like I have to. I'm in Korea. I've already eaten raw chicken and pig intestines. Dog seems like the next logical step.

After reading this, you may think this is the worst future a puppy can endure.

But....

Dogs that are not eaten in Korea are spray painted with whatever color the owner sees fit. I saw one the other day sporting a pink sweater over a bright yellow body. These pet dogs are generally smaller and kept in a woman's purse. The big hounds are taken into the kitchen.

South Korea. One place it is both natural and beneficial to be small. I guess.

Korean Kristmas

Had the Day off! Christmas Day that is. I worked on the Eve before until about 1030. Taught about symphonies, while concentrating mostly on Beethoven's Eroica. I mispronounced it each time I came across the term in class. Air-oyca. Air-o-ica. I think I may have even said Erotica at one point.

The subject material was difficult. Even for a master musician such as myself.

Piano for 6 years. Six excruciating years of my mom forcing me to tickle the ivories. I actually told my class that my mom would literally tie me to the piano for hours upon hours, forcing me to practice. Wish I stuck with the classical instrument. All I can play now is the intro to Satin Doll, the Jaws theme song (da-da...da-da...) and the C-scale.

Guitar for 1 year. I found it smashed in the basement one day. Guess somebody in my house didn't like hearing BB-Mack-Back Here, Baby 30 times a day. I think I really could've made a career as a guitarist. I was beginning to write my own music. Had a great tune about "Love in the Lunchroom," involving an overweight high school student and his undying, unrequited love for grilled cheese sandwiches.

Played the saxophone for a couple weeks and blew out thousands of ear-bleeding squeaks. I think I only took up the sax because of a girl I liked in 7th grade. Thought I could easily pick it up, throw on some shades and groove my smooth self right on into her life.

Could've been me. "We could have been so good together. We could've lived this dance forever."

Christmas in Korea was not at all like Xmas in the states. Only about 30% of Koreans are Christian. There is not the kind of hype that happens throughout the month of December in America. This is both a good and bad thing.

Good because I don't hear Christmas music, see Christmas movies non-stop everywhere I go. I can play both on my computer when I feel the need to. Downloaded some great songs from the Bad Santa soundtrack. Exceptional movie.

I did miss being with family, friends, decorating the Christmas tree with preschool art class creations and sitting around a warm fire on Avalon Circle. It was difficult to Skype my family Christmas Day. Not just because it was 8 am my time and the earliest I'd woken up in about 5 years, but also because I miss them.

I spent Christmas in Seoul with LW. It was nice to see him. He's always in such high spirits, especially around the holidays.

We had a great dinner in Itaewon. Turkey, mashed potatoes, apple pie. The Thanksgiving dinner I never ate. Nice change from Tuna and ketchup. My rice cooker broke the other night, so it is difficult to include that staple any longer.

We exited Itaewon soon after dinner. As you've learned from previous posts, it would probably not be a wise area to ring in Christmas cheer.

Caught a glimpse of this guy down an alley outside the restaurant. Kind of distressing.

The food was delicious and the night was eventful. But not quite as eventful as our next night in Hongkik University. Here are a few of the exciting and strange things that happened the night after Christmas:

1. Never Again Bennigan-

Went out to dinner at Bennigans in the City Hall area of Seoul, which is probably the most beautiful area I've seen during this holiday season. Amazing lights, horse drawn carriages, friendly people, Christmas trees. The type of Holiday Cheer I don't see in Chuncheon.

Anyway, I ordered a steak at Bennigans. Mushroom steak. Medium rare. I guess all the waitress heard was rare.

Bloody and extremely chewy. I couldn't even cut into it. I almost just grabbed it with my two hands and ripped the meat off with my teeth. By the time I told her to take it back, it looked like I had dissected and completely mutilated some poor animal.

She didn't seem to be too happy and brought my steak back without any sides. We then had a discussion about tapeworms and convinced Alex that he had one. We also debated whether tapeworms were still or should be used by obese people to lose weight.

2. I can be Jewish for a drink.

Conversation with a guy who graduated from Brown on Saturday night.

Me- Where did you go to school?

Him- Brown, baby!

Me- Wow. Great school. I have two cousins that graduated from there in '07.

Him- Really? Who? What are their names?

Me- Goldberg.

Him- Ahhh. So you're Jewish?! Me too! Shots?!

Me- ....N--heim!!

3. Cait Hall.

Had a Fordham Reunion in Korea. Cait Hall, Alex K and Matt Monagan together in Seoul. We all lived in Alumni South Freshman year and found ourselves posing in a picture in a South Korean bar very much the same way we would've posed for one in Jolly Tinkers in the BX.

It was great to see her and hear about her experience.

However, I think most of the night all I kept saying to her was, "Cait Hall...Korea!"

It was hard to really get into a deep conversation. Just couldn't stop dancin'.

4. Come on Eileen!

Come on Eileen. A classic college/bar song. Really gets people pumped up and out on the dance floor. I'd say it's up there with Shout and Return of the Mac. Even though nobody knows what the singer is saying in many points throughout the song. Guess thats what makes it great at bars. If you're drunk and unable to speak, you can't really mess up the lyrics to Eileen, because there aren't any actual words. Same with "Louie, Louie."

Anyway, I was getting into the song with a large group of people. Doo, ra, doo, ra, doo, rayaa! All of a sudden, I was lifted up into the air and carried across the bar. This happens many places Eileen is played. There should be a warning from the DJ.

As they carried me, they were also tossing me up and down, like I was some piece of plywood. No regard for human life. My head must've hit the ceiling at least 5 times.

Do I have brain damage? Possibly.

Will I crowdsurf to Come On Eileen again? Come onnn...Absolutely.

Good Movie, Great Soundtrack

There are many things I could choose to do with my free time in Korea:

I could read classic, world literature, write a novel, become fluent in Korean, take steroids/lift at the gym and come back to the U.S. breaking skulls, learn how to use chopsticks correctly, cook a real, filling meal or learn how to play the tuba.

But instead, I choose to read once in a while and, most of the time, watch endless hours of American movies online. Thank you OV-Guide.

I've watched classics like "Almost Famous," "American Beauty" and "The Never Ending Story."

I've also caught up on popular films I'd told people I'd seen to carry-on with a conversation and avoid explanations why I hadn't seen them. "Pulp Fiction," "The Usual Suspects," and "Being John Malchovich."

But what I love more than anything are great movies with even better soundtracks. "The Shawshank Redemption" is a prime example of a film with an amazing soundtrack.

The sharp rises and falls of Thomas Newman's orchestra flow perfectly with Morgan Freeman's poetic narrations throughout Redemption. Can there be hope? Should there be hope? The right soundtrack can sometimes make an entire movie for me. Here are a few recent examples I came across:

Groove Armada- Hands of Time (Collateral)

Awesome song to listen to at night. It's played in the movie when Jamie Foxx's character is driving Jada-Pinkett Smith's character along the LA Freeway at night. Most people I talk to hate LA. It's trash. It's so polluted. It smells like a porta-potty in a sewage dump.

But when you watch this scene in the movie, with Groove Armada in the background and Michael Mann's creative outlining of a warm, tempting LA night, the city looks magical.

La Vie en Rose- Louis Armstrong (Wall-E)

Doesn't seem like a good song for a Pixar-animated film about a robot? It's not good. It is perfect. The song is so simple and innocent, just like Wall-E's love for his foreign robot. Listening to him wheeling around to this slow, soft melody really captured the simplicity and uniqueness with which this film was made.

This song has also turned me on to listening to more Jazz music. DLin' a lot of Louie Armstrong.

Also: Other soundtracks done by Thomas Newman- (American Beauty, Road to Perdition, Most Sam Mendes movies)

Beauty:

Fordham Bball...Just a little less Whitty these days

He came, he screamed, he won, he danced with the fans. Then he lost. Then he lost again. Then he lost 94 times in six seasons.

Don't get me wrong. Derek Whittenburg was a great dancer. But even a Mono dance can't get somebody out of a 69-112 record.

It seemed that Coach Whitt was a great speaker, had high energy and superb relationships with administration. But was he a coach? Did he have the best facilities? And why didn't this guy get more quality P.T. during his reign?

LUUUUKKKEEEEE!!!

Coach Whitt:

What did he do?

He compiled a 135-162 record over 10 seasons and change. His best year came at Wagner where he led the Seahawks to the a 15th seed in the NCAA tournament in '03.

Wagner competes against powerhouses such as Central Connecticut State University and Farleigh Dickinson (Fairly Ridiculous) University in the NEC.

What does NEC stand for? That is not a rhetorical question. I actually have no idea.

He came into Fordham fresh off this NCAA tournament appearance/disappearance during a 20 point loss to Pitt. He was well-liked by the fans for his high energy and ability to recruit better talent than prior coaches.

After an 18-12 season my sophomore year and strong showing in the A-10 tournament, things looked good. Expectations were high for a team of returning seniors, including one Bryan Dunston, who is playing here in South Korea and doing quite well.

But, the next 2 years were atrocious. There seemed to be no set plays in his offense. It was run and gun, and miss.

It was like an Overlook game back at Kingsbury School in Waterbury. The days when it was ok to wear sweatpants and school shoes on the hardwood. Dads refereed and players ran back and forth faster than piano metronomes.

I was more inclined to go to the campus chapel or even the library.

His ability to coach and relate to his players came into question and ultimately, he was fired this past Thursday.

Gymnasium Archaism:

But was it all Whitt's fault?

Fordham University's Rose Hill Gymnasium is the oldest gym still in use in NCAA division I basketball...

How many times do you hear it if you're at Fordham? 15-20. How many times do you like hearing it? 2. I only liked hearing it when Hubert Davis said it during an ESPN game my junior year and when I heard myself telling other people that Hubert Davis said it during an ESPN game.

How many perspective players enjoy playing in it? 1. Matty Beck: walk-on, '10.

GREAT!! The Oldest Gym in America! That's like having the oldest version of the I-pod or oldest car in the high school parking lot.

You are constantly made fun of by others for your inability to measure up in size and style.

Who wants to play in the oldest gym in America? Does Fordham even have any kind of basketball history that would prevent Ram enthusiasts from tearing down the 3,740 seat arena?

Looked up Fordham Basketball History on Wikipedia:

At the time it was built, it was one of the largest on-campus facilities in the country, earning it the nickname "The Prairie." The Rose Hill Gymnasium has been the site of many legendary college and high school basketball games, including Kareem Abdul-Jabbar's final high school game. During World War II, it was also used as a barracks. New York City Mayor Ed Koch lived in these barracks for a time.

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Who cares? Can I get an A-1o Championship? Can I get a top 50 high-school player? We are in New York City. Let's build a new arena down by Lincoln Center and entice some talent from this huge NYC pool. Send a scout down to Rucker Park. Have Fat Joe "Make it Rain" basketball players on Eddies Parade. Prairie gots to go.

Key Winter Pick-ups

Sweet Egg Bread:

Although it is merely a cracked egg on top of a sweet biscuit, this korean delicacy has transformed my life. I've been going almost every night during my walk home from school. I usually get two. One for before dinner and one for after. Maybe I should mix it in with my tuna/rice combo? Add a little zip to the bap (rice in Korean).

I went late last night to the stand for round two of sweet egg bread and two drunk korean men were loading up on the dessert. Their faces were red and they laughed greedily, looking first at the stand, then back at me, then back at the stand, as the cook shoveled 5 into their bags.

I came up and asked for one bread. She crossed her hands. "No." No more.

I snapped a look at the 2 korean men and felt betrayed. I felt like somebody had just thrown out a brand new can of tuna fish or I was forced to work on Christmas Day. Wait, I do have to work on Christmas Day. That made me even angrier.

I looked at the egg bread, as they stuffed it into their mouths. I felt like pulling a Bilbo Baggins when he sees the ring around Frodo's neck for the first time.

But then I went to the corner store and bought a Snickers.

Winter Jacket:

A teacher who recently left passed this along to me. Much needed and much appreciated. Thank you Jonathan. Although my Botanical Garden jacket is comfortable and has been through a lot of ornamental conifer collections, holiday train shows and keg parties, I had to retire it to the closet for something warmer.

The black "Redface" (Not to be confused with Northface) has a hood and padded outer layers. Full-proof for the winter, I hope.

I didn't wash the jacket when it was given to me for two reasons. First, because I'm not too sure if you're supposed to wash this type of material. Will it shrink? Are you supposed to wash any clothing with zippers? I think I've washed my dress pants like twice since I've been here. No iron, no dryin'. I'm never too sure.

Second, I know jonathan would not wash it if I had given him my jacket (I don't know if he washes anything.) So, secondly, out of respect for Jonathan.

Blanket and Pillow:

I was cleaning up my apartment the other day and I found another heavy blanket that I can use for the winter! I've slept with it the past two nights. Very nice and very warm. Glad I found it before December. Probably would've had to sleep in Jonathan's jacket.

Also, found a bed pillow underneath my bed. I was kind of curious if I even had one for the past 3 months. I'd been using a small pillow that would usually be found on a couch or large chair. Very frustrating. But now I'm pretty much set at night. Just need to find one of these to complete my bedding experience. All the rage in Korea.

Toaster Oven:

Tuna Melts, Bacon, Egg and Cheese sandwiches, bagels, BLTs, French Fries. Man. Sounds like a breakfast date between Louie Andersen and Rosie O'Donnell. And, yes. I can now make all of these foods using my toaster oven. I've only had a couple Bacon, Egg and Cheese sandwiches and a few bagels. Really a quality pick-up.

However, I have nowhere to put the oven, so I use it from the floor next to my bathroom. Hopefully the chord doesn't get too wet.

Louie, Louie