Many times, the exhale will be accompanied by a waft of cigarette smoke. Sizzling through your lungs and exploding into a stranger's face on the walk from work back to your apartment.
Later on, the exhale can become foul and dank. It is usually laced with a mixture of tequila, whiskey and Natty Light. Beware all breathalyzers and close-talking, grind-happy beezie-beneezies.
By 3 am, the exhale has become short, weathered and reeks of either cheesesteak wiz or pepperoni from a late night visit to Passione Pizza.
Honestly, at this point, the exhale contains such a strange combination of odors, they all just combine into one grey block of wackness. Wintergreen can't save you. Breath mints are powerless. Maybe down a bottle of cologne and wear a car freshener around your neck?
So about that Friday night exhale. Still feel refreshing? Hello ladiesss. Who wants to make out?
Due to these escapades and awful smells that occur on a Friday, we've been taking the night off and saving ourselves for Saturday. One night a week feeling that disgusting should suffice.
Exhales have been fresh and clean on Friday night and Saturday morning for the past couple months (minus a few to more than a few slip-ups) and life has been good.
So what do we do on Fridays instead of drinking beers and eating cheesesteaks?
This past Friday was pretty great. We ordered delivery from Moon House (a Chinese restaurant that's located directly underneath our apartment) and watched reruns of Jersey Shore. I fell asleep on the couch at around 10:30 pm and woke up around midnight to our speakers humming the below song on loop. I have no idea how it came on, but it is a song we all have, and every man should have on their i-pods. Both Lynch and Alex had gone to sleep. Maybe cheesesteaks and beers would've been a more exciting option?
How are you spending your Fridays?
